Capture your smile,

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

It's E Learning Day today!
so yes, i was on the com since 8 this morning. :D
finished all assignments and school homework! ;]
YAY! ;D

& i watched 1 Litre of Tears. :D
i swear it's like the best jap drama i've watched! ;D
yupyup.
watch it. (:
WARNING: may be sad at some parts.
but it is still a great show! :D

yup. feel so lazy now. =X
i miss school! (:
anyways, going off soon.
gotta get some fresh air or i'll suffocate! D:

so yes.
off for fresh air real soon! ;]
oh yeah,

TO LIONEL;
cheer up okay! ;D
don't worry!
i'll pray. ;]

& to SAMANTHA&AMANDA;
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO BOTH OF YOU! ;D
pass you your pressie tomorrow! ;]]
LOVES !

okay. that's all.
blog next time. (:

just one phrase to say it all.
but why is it so difficult?

it's 6:10 AM now

Monday, April 28, 2008

WENT FOR SERVICE TODAY! :DDDD

YAY! (:
i missed everyone from Cell Group! ;D
Praise the Lord that my foot is tons better.
Tendant tear. ):
it still hurts when i walk,
but i dun care.
I CAN WALK AND THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS! ;D
no more crutches. ;]

so yes,
my previous post was super emo. ):
i know that..
THANK YOU TO EVERYONE FOR ASKING ME TO CHEER UP,
but dun worry about me.
those emotions were all so bottled up.
no one will understand my predicament.
& i advise you not to try to understand,
because it won't do you any good.
trust me. (:
YOU ALL SHOULDN'T WORRY ABOUT MY PROBLEMS. ;D
& i'm sorry for troubling all of you. D:

okay.
i'm happy now i guess. (:
cos i went for service. :D
but sad cos i can't go for Cell group anymore. D:
haiz.
banned. )):
super sad luh.
cos i dun talk to everyone much during service since i always have to go home and study straight after service. DD:

tomorrow is E-Learning Day. (:
no need to go to school ):
i love going to school,
because all i do at home is HOMEWORK. Dx
boring homework kills me.
maybe i'll attempt to finish reading 1litre of Tears. (:
it's a great book, but in chinese.
HEHEH x)
but you can always watch the movie on Youtube. ;D

okay,
that's about all.
Thank you God for blessing me always.
All those songs and praises are in my head now.
;]

& he still doesn't know it,
i just wish i could tell him.

it's 11:24 AM now

Saturday, April 26, 2008

i just learnt life's important lesson today.
NEVER TRUST ANYONE.
not even your family, your teachers, your BEST friends, your friends,
nobody.
because all they do is give you FALSE hope everytime.

they can say you look BEAUTIFUL,
but deep down inside,
they will say, "OH GOSH, SHE'S THE UGLIEST PIECE OF SHIT!"

they can say you did WELL,
but they actually meant that you SUCKED.

they can say you are OUTSTANDING, but SLACKED A BIT.
but they actually wanted you to know that
YOU WERE THE LEAST BIT OUTSTANDING AND YOU SLACKED A LOT.

just that little bit of consolation.
just that tiny bit.
it gives us false hope everytime.
why give us false hope.
just be straight to the point.
shove it to our face.
why beat around the bush?
IT'LL ONLY HURT US MORE.

no one understands.
you failed, big deal.
just try again.
that's just a mistake.

but i can say,
it's not just a simple mistake,
it's not just a small failure,
it's a HUGE mistake,
it's a BIG failure.

& you know why,
because you were never me.
you don't understand what it'll feel like,
to have every step of your life planned out.
as if you were in this world for a purpose-
which is to serve your creator.

NO CHOICES! NO DECISIONS!
JUST DO IT THAT WAY!
YOU HAVE TO DO THIS...
YOU HAVE TO DO THAT...
these phrases echo in my head.
then what's the point of living then,
if life is just about being controlled,
being PERFECT.

so i have concluded that,
i came to this world for a purpose,
god gave me a purpose,
to LISTEN and OBEY others,
let them FEEL BETTER about themselves,
because they KNOW that there is someone there they can LOOK DOWN on.
because they KNOW she is NOT AS GOOD as themselves.
because they KNOW she will make them HAPPY,
because they KNOW she will NEVER FIGHT for her rights.
because they KNOW she will GIVE IN always.
because they KNOW she will....
she will...
she will...

DO ANYTHING TO BE THAT PERFECT LITTLE GIRL EVERYONE WISHES SHE WILL BE.

yes.
i'll do that.
that's my only PURPOSE in life isn't it?

it's 3:56 AM now

Monday, April 21, 2008

MISSED SERVICE TODAY! D:
weah.
heard it was really good cos Dr Kim (from Korea) came! ;D
thanks to my injured foot.
i can't stand, i can't walk. ):

AHHHH DD:
tomorrow there's school,
all i can do is hop hop hop to class. )):
well.. at least i watched the last part of the service.
& yes, i felt god's presence,
my pain seemed to have gone away for a second before it came back. ;D
THANK YOU GOD FOR LIFTING OFF 1 SECOND OF MY PAIN. (:

so yeah.
tomorrow CAs start! D:
& my foot still hurts so much.. ):
gosh gosh. my mom bought me crutches. -____-"
i feel so damn crippled now.
like WTH.

haiz. oh well.
just see what happens tomorrow. (:
THANK YOU TO ALL WHO KEPT ASKING ME IF I WAS ALRIGHT. ;D

it's 11:18 AM now

Sunday, April 20, 2008

CELL GROUP TODAY!
had Captain's Ball tournament! ;D
butbutbut, i pulled my muscle at my ankle! D:
super painful now! DD:
can't even walk. ):

so our team didn't win.
i am so so so sorry. ):
if only i had been more careful,
i would have been able to catch those 2 balls and we will at least win! (:
my apologies to my teammates, Sharon, Lionel, Justin, Wei Yuan and Lina. ):
YOU ALL WERE GREAT! :D

& THANK YOU! to:

Vicki for helping me rub my leg. (:
you're like super caring luh. ;D

Hong Shun for running to buy ice. (:
super sorry to trouble you. /:

Kai Sheng for taking my place during the last minute of the game.
& the chocolate too. ;]
(VICKI&SANDRA: DON'T THINK FUNNY OKAY?!)

Sandra, Sheena, Jordan, Yiwen, Lionel, Nihua and everyone else there
(paiisehh & super sorry if i left out your name)
for asking if i was okay,
making sure i was okay. :D
THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH! ;D

so yeah.
now my foot hurts a lot.
i'm wondering how i'm gonna go for service tmr..
):
I WANNA GO! :DDD
even though today i injured my leg,
i loved today! ♥
&EVERYONE FROM CELL GROUP 405! ♥ ♥

my tears fell for a reason,
i cried because i just had to let it all out.

it's 8:43 AM now

Thursday, April 17, 2008

MARISSA!

YOU HAVE TO STUDY HARDER!

IT'S HIGH TIME I BUCK UP.
I WANT ALL THSOE PERFECT GRADES AGAIN.

it's 11:33 AM now

WHOLE FAMILY DOWN WITH GASTRIC FLU! D:

weah. ):
pray Mom, Sandra, Bobbi and Denise get well soon! :D
i'll pray for all of you. (:
i'm like crashing at friend's house. ):
super sorry for disturbing you and your families. DD:
AHHHH Dx
feel so bad now!

anyways,
did math test just now!
FREAK! ):
got 6/10!
AHHHHHHHHHH D':
i am so DEADDD ):
sure fail already!
OMG LUH.
i feel like CRYING! T.T

how could my day get any worse.
):
my grades are so so so so bad! D:
weahweahweah. ):
like gosh.
tonight i can cry myself to sleep.

i hate failures.
i am a failure.
that's why i hate myself.

it's 11:28 AM now

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

STRESSED OUT! D:

haiz. tired. D:
slept really late last night just to finish art and Home Econs and SPH assignment on Cyber Bullying.
):
sad case.
my head was exploding.
& had fever. Dx
was so scared taht i would faint in class today. ]:

anyways,
THANK YOU TO EVERYONE FROM CELL GROUP W405
for praying for me (as well as Vicki) last night.
i'll pray for any of you if you face any problems! ;D
Praise god for blessing me with such caring friends. (:

WOOTS(:
that's about all i have to say today. ;]
gotta go back to my assignments. :D

in my first memory,
i am three years old,
and i am trying to kill my sister.
-My Sister's Keeper.

this is why i love this book. <3

it's 6:15 AM now

Sunday, April 13, 2008

GOSH!
DEADLINES ARE SO HARD TO MEET! D:
Jiayous Marissa!
you MUST complete ALL articles by Monday!

anyways,
today was Cell Group! ;DDD
teehee. XD
i talked more today! (:
so happy.
& yes, gave a testimony today.
my first testimony. ;]
&& i want to share it with everyone else. :DD

"I know some of you know that these two weeks have not been good for me. I started with the 1st of April where i played a prank in school. I got into quite a lot of trouble and ahd to see the DM. The DM scolded me and asked me to do Pupil Reflection. then the next day, she realised it was a misunderstanding. I was quite angry then as she did not even apologise. On that very day, we lost to Nanyang. so yes, that made me very sad already. And to add on, i failed my math test that same morning. So i had 3 failures on that day. i was so emo and sad. Subsequently, all my assignments from SPH just came the days after. i was like so stressed and emo. Many friends SMS make sure i was okay and to cheer me up. On the bus to tournament at Jurong East, i would emo and my teammate tried to cheer me up by telling me jokes, i managed to laugh, but i would become sad very soon after. I would like to praise and thank god for blessing me with so many caring friends and also teaching me that i will have to put every failure behind me and keep moving on. Amen."

its true.
i wouldn't be able to survive without all my friends. (:
big big big THANK YOU seesion now. ;]

THANK YOU TO RUTHIE, MY DEAREST BEST FRIEND.
i am so sorry for always letting you see me emo. i am terribly sorry that i shouted at you on the day i failed Math. A HUGE THANK YOU to you for always trying your hardest to tell me jokes to make me smile when i'm down. i really don't know how i'll make it through without you.
:DD

THANK YOU TO FELICIA, JOLENE, HUIRU, CHARLENE & SHENGJIA
for always trying to cheer me up during class.
;}}}

THANK YOU TO MY TEAMMATES! MY DEAR TEAM. (the one that went to Nationals)
Amanda, Hui Nee, Soniya, Sinthiya, Celia, Vismitha, Trudy, Janice, Siti, Michelle and Colette. & Ms Tan too!
For your constant support and encouragement. Especially during the days when i was really emo. you all told me jokes, made me laugh with your normal fun selves! THANK YOU SO MUCH!
;]

THANK YOU TO MY FRIENDS FROM CELL GROUP,
Hong Shun, Lionel and Kai Sheng for listening to me.
(like gosh, i know i talk a lot kaes, so sorry to burden you all!)
& also to all the other Cell Group friends that were worried about me.
(okay, i swear i do not know who you all are, cos nobody ever told me, so yeah. THANK YOU SO MUCH anyways! i'm okay now.)
(:

THANK YOU TO YOU *SPECIAL ONE
for always making me laugh when i'm down. you always cheer me up. (:
thank you so much. ;D

THANK YOU TO EVERYONE ELSE WHO HAS MADE ME SMILE DURING THOSE, THE ONES THAT WORRIED FOR ME WHEN I WAS DOWN, THE ONES THAT PRAYED FOR ME, THE ONES THAT HELPED ME OUT ONE WAY OR ANOTHER! ;D

& last but not least,
THANK YOU GOD FOR BLESSING ME ALWAYS.
PRAISE THE LORD! (:

the biggest thank you to everyone,
all my friends which god has blessed me with,
you all mean the world to me.

it's 12:41 PM now

Saturday, April 12, 2008

todayy was damn fun! (:
LUNCH WITH TEAMMATES! ;DDDD
i just love team bonding!

so after that,
went to Chermaine's house to do party stuff! (:
Sinthiya, Hui Nee, Amanda, Samantha, Soniya and Colette came too. ;]
they went to slack, eat, play games and watch TV.
LOLLOLLLOL :D

can't wait for CHERMAINE'S PARTYYYY (:
like hell yeah, if i did,
i would kill myself.
seriously.
:]]]]]

so yes,
tomorrow there is CELL GROUP! :D
& oh gosh.
i have no bible yet.
damn it. ):
I MUST GET ONE ASAP! ;D

today rocked.
& yes, i'll miss the team.
TK BADDY C DIVISION '08 IS LOVE! <3
because team mates one of the most important people in my life.
i so don't wanna go B Div. DD:
CDIV'08 IS STILL THE BEST!
can't wait for BDIV'10! (:

your sweet smile,
your melodious voice.

it's 12:43 PM now

Friday, April 11, 2008

HEY EVERONE! :D
haven't updated for a looong time.
& yes. i ahve to link people too. :D

LOLS(:
so many assignments from IN. ]:
a bit tired.
always sleeping at 12 these days. D:
anyways, anyone who knows a friend who is being cyber bullied,
or is/was being cyber bullied,
please tell me. (:
i need interviewees. ;D
i have 2 more slots.
but heck, the more the merrier. ;]]

oh yes, made a list of stuff i'm looking forward to!

#1. TOMORROW!
Team lunch at Parkway tomorrow. (:
YAYYY! ;D
i love the team a hell lot. <3
after that, going to help Chermaine with party stuff. ;D

#2. SATURDAY!
cos there's cell group! (:
LOLS :D

#3. SUNDAY!
cos there's Church! ;D
& i'm missing Siew Yun's birthday. DDD:
WEAHHHH. ]]]]]];
enjoy yourself babe! :DDD

#4. NEXT FRIDAY!
cos its CHERMAINE'S birthday! ;]
& Media Club Workshop! :D
&& it'll be a great day! (:
'Family Reunion' Ruthie calls it... XD
like LOLLOLLOL. xP
*kicks Ruthie's chair*
hehe. :DDDD

WAHAHAHA xD
deadlines are tomorrow and Monday!
must remember. (:
teehee.

when i hear your voice,
my heart skips a beat.
i can't wait to see you again.

it's 12:08 PM now

Sunday, April 6, 2008

Cell Group was today!
went after tuition with Sandra. (:
so took MRT to Yishun and met Vicki at the Control before going to the interchange to take a bus to Lionel's house. ;D

reached there at about 11.45?
then waited till Lionel, Hong Shun, Li Hua and some others finish their Bible Studies before Cell Group started. (:
played a game that Jordan introduced to us!
super fun.
but we need tons of coordination! :D

after that, we sang some songs while Jordan and Lionel played guitars.
Sandra wants to play too! :D
i am so sure she can play damn well. ;DD

then Li Hua gave us a preaching session on 'The Dark Valleys of Life'.
interesting and it all makes so much sense! ;D
oh gosh.
haven't got my bible yet. ):
damn it. D:
looks like i have to share with Vicki again. /:
i am so sorry for always having to share with you! DD:

then said some prayers.
after that was offerings.
soon after was refreshments.
i swear, it has been like super long since i ate curry puff and actually FINISHED it. ;D
(cos curry puff are liek some quite spicy, and then i dun eat)
so today i ate! :D
YAY (:

so after that.
left to go home cos Sandra had a concert to go to. (:
yupyup.
tahts about it.
had great fun today! (:
looking forward to service tomorrow. :D

the little things that make life great,
are the big things that make me happy.
(:

it's 12:22 PM now

Saturday, April 5, 2008

there's still so many many photos. D:

not time to upload.

so slow. TT

& i gotta go sleep now. ):

tution early tomorrow morning! DD:

CELLGROUP TOMORROW! ;D

can't wait.

:DDD

it's 12:40 PM now

SPORTS DAY! ;D
today was Sports Day. (:
ran one event today.
4x400m. (:
but we didn't win. D:
but good news is..

2e5'08 WON 1st FOR CHEERLEADING! ;DDDDD
like gosh luh,
i am so happy!
(cos i'm a cheerleader)
& yes, i am so proud of all of you cheerleaders!
WE WON! ;DD
& we all put in a lot of effort.
GREAT GREAT GREAT SUPER GREAT JOB! :DDDD
ilove2e5'08cheerleaders<3

thank you to all those that helped out in one way or another to support us and help us. :D
we all appreciate it. (:
yup yup,
gold trophy for us. :D
like yay! (:
HAPPYHAPPYHAPPY! ;D

Note:
i can't dance for nuts.
i'm serious.
(:

so after Sports Day was training at Xin Min! (:
played 3vs.2.
i partnered Celia against Lynette, Sydney and Cheryl.
after that partnered Celia again and played against Jodi, Cheryl and (oh shit.. i forgot you name! damn. paiisehh. -_______-")
i keep forgettign people's names. D:
damn. ):

so after that,
we cleared the hall for their Speech Day rehersal.
and ran 5 rounds outside.
gosh, after Sports Day feels so tiring sometimes.
like you have absolutely no more energy to run. Dx
thats how all of us felt.
dead tired.

so yeah.
that was the highligts. (:
teehee.
posting photos! :DDD

it's 11:57 AM now

Friday, April 4, 2008

TODAY WAS THE SH!TTIEST DAY! DDD:
3 sh!ts. ):

1. had to go see Mdm lenny to hand up Pupil Reflection form when I DID NOT DO ANYTHING WRONG! then she said i had to go talk to Ms Su (again) and Ms Terry. like gosh okay. apparently teachers dun know how the newspaper industry works.
you can't just say, "NO! TELL THE PERSON TO TAKE THE PHOTO OFF!" & zap it goes off.
LIKE HELLO, it's NEWSPAPER, NOT SOME MAGICAL THING THAT GOES *POOOFFF* into thin air. like WTH. it doesn't work taht way. like WTHHHHH. D: make my life so difficult. if i knew, i wouldn't have taken the assignment.
bloody sh!t luh. DD:

2. I FAILED MATH! D:
ahhhh. i failed Math. ):
i'm in remedial now. and i can't tell my mom or she'll skin me alive! DDD:
T.T so sad. ):
SHIT! i am so regretting that i liek didn't study.
Ruthie told me its cos i don't eat! Dx

3. WE ____ TO NANYANG! T.T
WEAHHHH ):
i played like shit today can.
i can't stop swearing.
i'm super pissed, super emo, super mixed up.
(just nothing but happy)

BUT DID I MENTION THAT SITI IS THE BEST JUNIOR EVER? ;D
i swear, Siti ROCKS my world.
my dear junior. (:
you are the best! <3

4. DRENCHED&SOAKED FROM HEAD TO TOE IN THE RAIN!
yes. i lost my umbrella.
& i walked hoem in the rain since i haven't bought a new one. ):
hope i dun get sick. (:
Sports day is tomorrowwww. D:
running 4x400m ):
i am so gonna pull down the etam. i run super slow can. DD:
& CHEERLEADING FINALS!
dunscrewup.plsdunscrewup.
& i have to split on mud. =X

gosh.
so today.
after tournament.
of course we were damn disappointed luh.
so yeah.
blasted music in the school bus back to school.
& drove the bus driver crazy. ;]
sent songs to Sinthiya,
and messaged now and then. (:

sang Untitled by Simple Plan,
The Reason by Hoobastank (damn, forgot the spelling, paiisehh -________-")
My Happy Ending by Avril Lavigne
& lots more! ;D
WHEEEEE (:
i love bonding like this with the team,
cos we know we'll be there for each other no matter what.
ILOVEYOUTEAM!<3
WE'LL SQUASH SC LIKE A BUG! ;DDDD

so yeah.
i emo-ed tons tons tons today. ):
sorry dear Ruthie, Jolene, Hui Ru, Amanda and everyone else who tried to cheer me up. :D
my head was just so messed up today. ):
i am so sorry okay.
especially to Ruthie,
i shouted at you so many times today! D:
i feel so damn bad now. =X
I AM SO SORRY BESTIE! D:

& so yeah.
thank you to everyone who tried to cheer me up at school, via sms, msn, friendster, letters, notes, etc. etc.
ILOVEYOUALL!<3
Thanks a million! ;D

a crack in our bottle of faith ;
but we'll still make it through.

it's 10:11 AM now

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

HAPPPY APRIL FOOL'S! ;D
many ask me if i played a prank today.
but even if i tell you,
would you believe me?
HAHAHA XD
i bet you won't. (:
i only told some people.
but i guess the truth will leak out somehow. /:

& yes.
i got into deep shit for that. D:
going to see Mdm Lenny tomorrow for a scolding. D:
like gosh,
so scared luh =X
but i asked for permission already.
haiz. WTHWTHWTH. DD:
hope i dun get suspended or anything.
or else. i'll be in the HOTTEST SOUP I'VE EVER BEEN IN! DDDDDDDDDDDDD:
LIKE FREAK! Dx

anyways.
WE WON KRANJI! :D
5-0.
but but but the draws for top 8 is like damn unlucky can? ):
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ! D:
Against Nanyang this Thursday!
against SCGS next Tuesday! (LIKE GOSH, ALL MY EX-TEAMMATES)
RGS next Thursday! (LIKE OMG)

yup.
we are so gonna try our best.
we want TOP 4 THIS YEAR! ;D
i swear.
it's the only thing we want this year.
(:
SO YES, WE WILL DO IT!
JIAYOUS TK BADDY C DIVISION 08! :DDDDD

we'll do it ; we'll make it through together

it's 8:16 AM now